Homophobe
by xxUnchainedMelodyxx
Summary: When Sherlock is bored, nothing good can come out of this.. John will realise once and for all that when Sherlock is bored, he's practically talking to a child instead of the greatest detective of all times. A funny, entertaining one shot. Rating T because I'm cautious.


**Disclaimer****: I don't own Sherlock and I'm not making money off this . ****This work is for entertainment purposes ONLY.**

**Spoilers: None!**

**Rating: T**

**Enjoy! **

Another ordinary, calm day, high possibility of nice weather and monotony. Sherlock is sitting on his chair, palms pressed together, like praying and eyes closed, meditating. Next to him, his faithful friend, Dr. John Watson is reading a newspaper.

Everything was looking good.. apparently, but in reality, things were a little different. Sherlock is.. _bored_. Inspector G. Lestrade hadn't phoned or messaged him lately asking for his help, once Scotland Yard had everything under control.

He couldn't shoot the smiley face on the wall anymore, because even this had become a little dull. He was forbidden to use a gun in the flat unless it was an emergency, but really .. that wasn't the reason why he didn't enjoy shooting the wall is Sherlock Holmes and he can do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. On top of that, John had hidden his smoking supplied _again_.

Suddenly Sherlock opened his eyes, smirking, and nothing good can come out of this..

''John,'' Sherlock said casually as if nothing is going to happen.

''Yes?'' John answered absent, still reading the newspaper.

''Are you gay?''

John's eyes widened as he gazed at Sherlock shocked. Sherlock remained calm, indifferent.

''Of course not!'' John hurried to answer.

''Are you homophobic then?'' John heard Sherlock's outraged voice.

John stood up fast heading towards the detective. Sherlock observing his reaction, stood up too. He could see that John was disturbed and embarrassed, even a little furious, but he kept the same neutral face. He was enjoying this so much.

''I'm. Not . Homophobic.'' John hissed bluntly.

''So.. you're gay.'' Sherlock sighed placing his hand on his friend's shoulder sympathetically.

''Admit it John. No one is gonna judge you.''

''I'm not gay!'' John cried, his cheeks reddened.

''Just admit it, you'd feel a lot better.''

''I'M NOT!'' John yelled pulling away Sherlock's hand.

''Admit it!'' Sherlock shouted.

''SHERLOCK!''

John's breathing was coming out in slight puffs. Sherlock never managed to annoy his friend that much to lose his temper and shout in the flat. John couldn't let Sherlock win.. couldn't he?

''How can I be gay if I date Sarah?'' John said trying to cool down. ''It's not official yet but-''

''Is Sarah a lesbian?'' Sherlock said surprinsed, obviously pretending.

''What?!'' John gasped.

''If you're gay then clearly she is gay difficult deduction.'' Sherlock said careless.

''Do you even know what homophobic means?'' John sighed frowning, feeling that he's talking to a kid.

''I don't need to, I'm not gay.'' Sherlock answered in a duh tone rolling his eyes.

John felt his pulse quicken, he couldn't continue with this stupid conversation anymore.

''Sherlock.. Sherlock, shut up or I'll punch you and it's nothing subtexted this time.'' John said, fists clenched to his sides. After all, he was a solider in Afganistan, he had bad days, too.

''John, let's not result to-''

Sherlock couldn't finish taking, as John was charging to him. He merely dodged doctor's fist, luckily he observed John while talking, but still.. that was fast! John leaped ahead missing the detective. He felt sorry for a moment, Sherlock really deserved it! Turning around, John suddenly stopped, seeing Sherlock smiling warmly with his hands up like he'd surrender.

''I should let you shoot the wall, shouldn't I?'' John said irritated.

''Bored..'' Sherlock moaned.

John sighed deeply looking resentful, then took the cigarettes behind the skull and threw them to Sherlock. Sherlock couldn't hide his joy, jumping in the air with excitement, then he sat calmly on his chair lighting a cigarette.

Seeing Sherlock so happy, John could feel his anger vanish little by little as he flipped on his chair sighing, but still.. Sherlock's question was bothering him.

''You, don't think I'm gay.. do you?'' John asked a little concerned.

''Never.'' Sherlock said grinning. John knew Sherlock wasn't taking him seriously.

''Sherlock.. stop it.'' John tried to convince Sherlock to be serious.

''Whatever you say, John.. whatever you say.'' Sherlock said, smoke curling up to the ceiling.

**Thanks for reading, I hope you liked it!**

**Please rewiew. x**


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